Deadspin's Best Long Stories Of 2018

Perhaps you need something to read on the plane home, or something to distract you while you avoid your in-laws. Here are the most compelling long features and essays we published this year so you can catch up before we do it all again in 2019. SafeSport, The USOC’s Attempt To Stop Child Abuse, Is Set Up To Fail—Just Like It Was Supposed To As he was questioned by lawyers in 2015 over and over again about what he did and did not know about sexual abuse suffered by Olympic athletes, then-U.S. Olympic Committee lawyer Gary Johansen made a choice. No matter the question, no matter which lawyer asked it, Johansen did not say “child abuse,” he did not say “sexual assault,” and he did not say “rape.” What he did say, over and over again in his deposition, was “SafeSport.�…

Red Sox Admit That WEEI Hosts Say Some Shitty Things

WEEI is where to go to hear Boston Red Sox games on the radio. It’s been that way for most years since 1995, and it will continue to be that way through 2023. Despite the partnership, the team can still acknowledge that the radio station encourages some terrible people. Since Orioles outfielder Adam Jones said that a fan at Fenway called him the N-word in May, the team has presented the notion that it’ll be cracking down on hateful behavior at the park. Team president Sam Kennedy said this in May: “I can tell you, when [the current Red Sox ownership group] arrived in 2002, I think one of the most important things with John Henry, [chairman] Tom Werner and [former president] Larry Lucchino did was acknowledge the shameful past of the Boston Red Sox,” Kennedy said. “There�…

Zosia Mamet's 2010 Rap Video Is Fake Bullshit [UPDATE]

Update: Like everything else in this godforsaken world, this is nothing but a crummy commercial. First, here's the tip we received a couple days ago from a "Donald Duck" at [email protected]:
Back in 2010 Zosia Mamet (Shoshanna from HBO's "Girls") tried to launch a rap career. (Remember her musical Kickstarter thing last year? She's been pushing the music game for a long time.)

My friend shot this promo video for her but it went nowhere. They tried to bury it, but I got a hold of it and JUST put it up on Youtube.

Please don't reveal my name. I don't want any attention. I just kind of think it's actually a little good and it would be funny if everyone saw it.

[YouTube link]

But if you're not interested,…

2011: The Year We Became The United States Of Trolling

Well, that about wraps up yet another shitty year of the new millennium. I don't know about you, but I personally can't wait to see what future shitty years have in store: rising water prices, a sharp growth in armed RoHoWa militias, a new Pitbull album … everything shitty is on the table, people. But if there was one glaring, constant theme of American life in 2011, it was this: 2011 was officially the year we became a fully realized nation of trolls. We now live in a country where it pays to be hated far more than it pays to be loved, where pissing people off is somehow viewed as a valuable commodity. We've been building to this shit for a while now, ever since Slate Magazine was founded and Sarah Palin pulled her first shotgun out of her pussy. 2011 has represented …

College Football Week 7 Picks

data-mm-id=”_6k6mv8ayr”>Finally, some zesty games with big names and intrigue. About damn time. Season Records: Koster 35-23; Giuffra 30-28; Phillips 29-29; McKeone 30-28Alabama (-17.5) at Texas A&MKoster: Jimbo Fisher wanted to compete for a national championship. This will be the third legitimate national title the Aggies have played this year. All will show just how much far off TAMU is from realizing that dream. Two big problems here: Alabama's offense can't be stopped and its defense is going to feast on the home team. Alabama 48, Texas A&M 10McKeone: I'd really like to imagine A&M covering the spread, but I just can't. Alabama 45, Texas A&M 21Giuffra: Texas A&M has two games against ranked opponents this year and has averaged 15 PPG in thos…

Ron Rivera Will Have Plenty of Options This Offseason

data-mm-id=”_fbhp8uwaq”>The news of Ron Rivera's firing by the Carolina Panthers came as a bit of a shock. The Panthers were indeed spiraling and lost, at home, to the ever-hapless Washington Redskins this past Sunday. But Rivera didn't exactly have the easiest time of it this year after losing his superstar quarterback and face of the franchise, Cam Newton, only two weeks into the season. But with new ownership in town, a change was made. While Rivera didn't really get a fair shake of it in 2019, this is probably for the best after the Panthers failed to build upon their NFC Championship-winning 2015. Argue all you want about the merits of this decision by the franchise, one thing is for certain- Rivera won't be out of a job for long, if he wants to keep coaching. …

Have a Take and Don't Suck: Inside the Twisted Minds of Jim Rome's Call-In Empire

data-mm-id=”_pmewbzeej”>The hot-take artist is a relatively new species in the sports media landscape. Long before it roamed the Earth, there was only a single living organism capable of surviving in such sweltering conditions. It was born in the jungle and survived by going all Lord of the Flies in a battle for the father of all smack's approval. Only the fittest survived and flourished. Primitive clones built a civilization out of trash talk and meritocracy.Over 25 years, the world has had access to the mind of the Jim Rome caller. And it's a been a wild ride as the Hall-of-Fame radio host has built an empire that embraces conversation over monologue. What follows is an attempt to study it from a safe distance by speaking to those closest to the action with the 26th edition…

Cam Newton's Best Option May Be Plotting His Revenge in New England

data-mm-id=”_7wgti2wdt”>Cam Newton has proven himself as a starting quarterback in the NFL, something people with extremely short attention spans forgot after watching a few injury-plagued games last year. The former MVP is almost inexplicably still looking for work in a league that values nothing more than a signal-caller who can win football games. At the center of the debate his attitude, or perhaps his perceived attitude. Is he a guy who would accept a backup role? Does he need to humble himself?And that's how the game is played in the NFL. The unique nail gets hammered down so it is dull like all the rest. Like it or not — and I assuredly do not care for it — this is the situation Newton now finds himself trying to make the best of with a happy face.The rumor mill has conne…

ไม่ถึงฝัน! Paragon- The Overprime ประกาศยุติให้บริการในเดือน เม.ย นี้

หากยังจำกันได้ ก่อนที่ Epic Games จะประสบความสำเร็จอย่างท่วมท้นกับ Fortnite ทางค่ายก็เคยเปิดให้บริการเกมที่เป็นประสบการณ์รูปแบบ MOBA ผสมผสานการยิงปืนแต่ก็ไม่สามารถดึงดูดความสนใจแฟนเกมได้มากพอ และในที่สุดก็ต้องปิดตัวลง กระทั่งไม่นานก็ได้รับการปลุกผีอีกครั้งโดยค่ายเกมเกาหลีอย่าง Netmarble

The NBA's Disney Bubble Plan Still Appears to Be Very Much Up in the Air

data-mm-id=”_j0ee0wpxw”>The NBA is currently preparing for a return to action at Disney World. As more details emerge, more people involved seem to be voicing completely reasonable concerns, including 40 to 50 players who are already considering staying home. On Thursday, the NBA started leaking exact timelines for each team as if to say, "don't worry, most of you will be home within eight weeks!" Still, the length of time the players will be in the Disney bubble isn't the most troublesome aspect of the current plan. Some people have noticed that the league is planning to do this in the state of Florida. It might as well still be April in Florida because they're actual worse off than they were two months ago. Via NBC Sports:”The numbers coming out of central Fl…